Featured News
The Best of Twitter 1-30-2012
New York Times: Tell Us Why It’s Ethical to Eat Meat
My New Religious Coworker…
How To»
How To Get A Job…If You’re An Idiot.
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I am a Bombdiggity Wife, Yo.Seriously fellas, I’m pretty fucking epic. In general, but especially as a wife. I know tons of ladies say... -
Possible responses for when your friend stumbles out of the closetLet me start this by saying, I don’t give a fuck who or what you want to touch your naughty bits against.... -
Ten Steps to Becoming a Kickass Female WingmanI have gotten my best friend laid a few dozen times. I have been his alibi since we were young kids. I have bold...
Movies»
Beav’s Choice Bad Movie Review: The Dungeonmaster
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Adam’s Choice Bad Movie Review: The Alley CatsAs dirty, stinky apes often do, Adam threw a handful of crap in my direction. Well, here it goes. This week,... -
Beav’s Choice Bad Movie Review: Catman in ParisI have decided to take Bogatabeav’s challenge and write the bad choice of the week on my iPad while watching... -
Adam’s Choice Bad Movie Review: Valhalla RisingI thought Adam was going to come stronger with his first bad movie pick, but he chose Valhalla Rising. Directed...
Lou Bega Called...»
Hostage Crisis
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The Big Mouth Billy Bass and the Economic DownturnThe economy is fucked up, you guys. Seriously. Shit is crazy. Ain’t nobody got jobs. Gas is 63 bucks a gallon. ...
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My Existential CrisisOh God. Who am I? What am I doing here? It’s like right when I feel like I got the hang of it, everything...
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The New Old MeSharon, I’m going to be Frank. I’m better at being Earnest when I can be Frank. But I just don’t...
Politics»
An Asshole’s Explanation of Politics: The Basics
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WikiLeaks ‘Spy Files’ – James Bond Sold SeparatelyWarning — do not read this article if you are: a) currently under the influence of any paranoia-amplifying... -
Some Advice to Occupy Wall StreetIt seems like the Occupy Wall Street movement has been getting beat up, lately, by the cops, the media, and conservative... -
Herman Cain: Leaving Over Some AssHerman Cain. What can be said about the man who is an extraordinary multi-tasker, past presidential contender,...
Advice»
“The Dick Method” of Picking up Women
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Being Pussy Whipped is UnattractiveSeriously guys. I am sick and tired of watching you all get pussy whipped by girls who aren’t even sleeping... -
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Threesome Series Part 1: The PlanJust thinking about a threesome can be awesome enough but getting one rolled into reality can be awesomatistically...
Recent Articles
New York Times: Tell Us Why It’s Ethical to Eat Meat
Recently I found this article in the New York Times where they were challenging any meat eaters to write articles on why they think it is Ethical to eat meat in 600 words or less, and they have a team of vegans who are going to judge the essays and post a few in the [...]
An Open Letter to Whoever Got This Tattoo
Dear Whoever Got This Tattoo, I want to personally thank you from the bottom of my heart for getting this, and I mean that in all sincerity. Because before seeing this, I was never actually able to explain to people why I think there are individuals in this country who need to be legally castrated. [...]
How To Get A Job…If You’re An Idiot.
Hello idiot. You’re applying for a job right? Great. I have two jobs. Comedy is the job I get paid for barely. My other line of work which I get a regular paycheck for is Technical Recruiting. Basically I get companies who are hiring to use my service; helping them find the right people for [...]
2Kgs Racism Free for the Rest of Black History Month 2012
I know many readers were awaiting the official announcement from 2 Kilograms that we were going to put our dogs in the fight to celebrate the historic month of February, and for you, this is it. As many people around the world look forward to celebrating the vast accomplishments of blacks, we too cherish February. [...]
A Drunk Interview with Comedian Alex Pearlman
This was by far one of the worst ideas I ever had. Like any bad idea, i thought of it and implemented it that day. I found a willing comedian with a substance abuse problem, and poured liquor down his throat. Alex Pearlman, an 8 year comedy vet, drank his face off and talked to [...]
A Transcript of My Brain Cells Waking Up After Being in an Alcohol Induced Coma
Those people who know me personally know that I have gone on a hiatus from my typical alcohol abusing ways, and have been dead sober for a month (and counting) for the first time since I was in high school. Over the last 11 and ½ years I’ve shut down and permanently retired more brain [...]
The Best of Twitter 1-30-2012
For those of you not nerdy enough to be on twitter, this is an opportunity for me to educate you on the hilarious nonsense you’re missing. Sure, for most people it may be a time vacuum that serves as nothing but a vessel for you to waste time at work, however for Comedians & Writers [...]
My New Religious Coworker…
At my job I had a room to myself for the better part of 6 months, with the only other person in the office being my manager who has his own room, and works from home on Friday’s. I’ve been able to kick off my shoes, blast work-inappropriate music, and watch Youtube videos labeled NSFW. [...]
The Best of Twitter 1.6.2012
For those of you not nerdy enough to be on twitter, this is an opportunity for me to educate you on the hilarious nonsense you’re missing. Sure, for most people it may be a time vacuum that serves as nothing but a vessel for you to waste time at work, however for Comedians & Writers [...]
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